11 Things You Need to Know When Cops Bust Your House Party

You’re busting a move on the dance floor, crammed between 50 inebriated guests. The music is pumping, the keg is flowing, and everybody’s grinding. Suddenly, someone yells, “The cops are here!” Panic ensues.

If you’re at someone else’s house, you have little to worry about (if you’re underage you can usually just walk away). But if this happens at your house, it’s up to you to stay in control of the situation and deal with the cops yourself.

So what do you do when the 5-0 comes a knockin’ with a mind to shut things down? Well, the law is actually on your side, so read on to learn the do’s and don’ts when protecting your house party from the fuzz. Keep in mind throughout this article that your number one goal is to keep cops from entering your home and completely shutting the party down.

Before You Meet the Cops at the Door

1. Keep all evidence of illegal activities hidden.

This is obvious but vitally important. Illegal items in plain view (like your 4-foot bong) provide enough evidence for cops to enter your house. Once inside, they are (depending on the police officer) more than likely to send everybody home. That’s why your number one mission is to keep the cops outside your house – so you can deal with any issues like noise, then keep the party going. Ideally, nobody inside should even know the cops showed up. (See How to Cop-Proof Your Party to minimize your risk).

2. Do not let anyone else open the door for the cops.

Make sure you tell people upon arrival that you are the only person allowed to open the door if the police come. Even if a cop yells through a window at a guest to open the door, make sure they immediately get you rather than let them in.

Why? Because if a guest lets the cops in, your gig is up. (We’re talking college house parties here). Once inside, they have free reign to completely shut you down, and they’ll probably search your sacred living space as well. (Talk about being violated). Don’t get me wrong, I have only love for police officers. Their job is to keep us safe and I have all the respect in the world for them. However, if you end up with a pair of officers who are having a particularly bad day, they will make it their mission scare the living crap out of you and leave you feeling violated in your own home. That’s why you don’t let them inside in the first place!

At bigger parties, there is always a group of people loitering in your entranceway. Ask them to make a choice: stay inside or go outside. Otherwise, if cops come, they will sail right through that open door without asking permission – and by law they can say that guests gave them permission to enter your house.

You must avoid this situation at all costs. Whoever is working the door must make sure it is shut immediately after people enter or exit. Your right to protect your home from being searched disappears if someone else lets the cops inside.

Meeting the Cops Outside

3. Meet the cops outside and immediately shut the door behind you without letting them in.

Take a deep breath, calm yourself (cops are people just like you and me), and step outside. Immediately shut the door behind you. Shutting the door is key and serves multiple purposes: it prevents the police from walking right by you and going inside, it stops the smell of intoxicants from escaping (which can be used as “evidence” to search your house), it lowers sound levels, and it stops the police from viewing any incriminating evidence left in plain view.

4. When talking to cops, be non-confrontational and calm.

Ask, “How can I help you, officers?” Be nice and remember that cops exist to protect us. Treat them like you would any unexpected visitor. You’ve got nothing to gain – and everything to lose – by being hostile. Even if the officers yell at you to let them inside, remain calm and courteous. Put yourself in their shoes. Imagine you’re a cop and you show up to a loud party: if the host turns out to be a punk and acts like an ass, you’d want to bust him, too.

5. Show respect for their authority by using the title, “Officer.”

Police officers put their lives at risk in order to make our neighborhoods safe. So treat them with the respect they deserve. Call them by their official title, “officer.” You have nothing to lose by showing you are aware of their authority, and some cops actually take offense if you don’t. Cops like it when you acknowledge their superiority. They take being respected seriously, and so should you.

6. Determine why the cops are there.

Sometimes cops show up for completely unrelated reasons. One night in high school, I was parked on the side of the street with a friend and noticed a police cruiser pull up. The officer in the passenger seat began questioning us, insinuating that we had been doing something illegal. It turns out the cop was actually looking for a man who was harassing nearby residents with a laser pointer. The moral of the story: Don’t assume the cops know what illegal things you’ve been up to even if they pretend they do know. (Luckily, he didn’t notice the endangered panda I’d captured that was shooting up heroin in my backseat).

It may be that the cops at your door are asking about a crime that happened down the street. More likely though, they came because of the noise complaint caused by your drunken friends singing along to “What is Love.” With some luck, though, the officers will leave if you agree to turn down the music.

7. Do not ever consent to a search or let the cops inside without a warrant.

Your job is to protect your home at all costs. Do not, at any point, consent to them entering. Police fficers won’t tell you that you have the right to refuse their entry. But you do have that right, and it’s your responsibility to exercise it.

Explicitly state that without a search warrant, you can’t let them inside. The only reason cops ask you if they can enter is because they don’t have enough evidence to search without your consent. I repeat: The only reason cops ask you if they can enter is because they don’t have enough evidence to search without your consent.

If you do not give them your consent, they cannot enter.

Tell the officers you understand they’re doing their job and you will keep the music down. Then ask if you’re free to go. It doesn’t matter what they say; there’s never a reason to allow them into your home.

If the cops say: “If nothing illegal is going on inside, then you have no reason not to let me in.” [They may then try to walk by you, interpreting your silence as consent]…

Respond: “Officer, I know you’re doing your job, but I do not consent to any searches. I’ll happily turn the music down as soon as I go inside. Am I free to go?”

This response will stop them from entering without a warrant. (If they do enter anyway and find illegal items, your attorney will throw out the case because the items were discovered through an illegal search).

Letting the police inside gives up your fourth amendment right protecting you from unreasonable search and seizure. Most police searches happen because people unknowingly waive their fourth amendment rights by consenting to warrantless searches. Keep in mind that “consenting to warrantless searches” could mean standing idly by as the cops try to walk inside the front door. You must actively NOT consent to searches.

If the cops say something like, “We have to do a routine check to make sure everything is okay inside,” they’re trying to trick you into giving up your rights.

If they begin to put the pressure on to let them in, simply answer their questions with questions.

8. Answer their Questions with Questions (“Am I Free to Go?”)

If they say: “I smell pot. Are people smoking marijuana inside?”
You respond: “Sir, I don’t smell anything. Am I free to go?”

If they say: “We need to do a routine check inside.”
You respond: “I will keep the music down, officer. Am I free to go?”

9. Either tell the truth, ask a question or remain silent. Do not lie.

Cops can tell when you’re lying. They’ve busted way too many parties to fall for any bull. So don’t do it. You’ll just piss them off and give them a reason to bust you.

Take a cue from politicians and avoid telling the truth by changing the subject.

If they say: “It sounds like there are underage drinkers in there. Are you supplying alcohol to minors?”

You respond: “Officer, if the music is too loud, I will turn it down. Am I free to go?”

Way to avoid the question! You’re becoming a pro.

If they continue: “You didn’t answer my question. Are you supplying alcohol minors?”

Then make sure you…

10. Do not answer any questions about illegal activities without your attorney there.

If they say: “You didn’t answer me. Are you supplying alcohol minors?”

You respond: “Officer, I have nothing to say until I speak with a lawyer. I will turn the music down as soon as I go inside. Am I free to go?”

If you don’t feel comfortable answering their questions truthfully, don’t say anything at all. In this case, silence is golden. Remember: anything you do say will be held against you later, and anything you don’t say can never be held against you. Don’t give them anything to work with. You can’t get in trouble for not answering questions.

In fact, in some cases, not answering questions may be the only way to not get busted. Remember that if the cops don’t have evidence or consent, they can’t enter. Since refusing to answer questions does not count as evidence, it can work in your favor… even if it feels extremely awkward at the time.

Unless they think you’re running a human trafficking ring, there’s no way the cops will get a search warrant for your house – particularly on a college campus where house parties are the norm. If you remain calm, respect authority and agree to turn down the music, you should get off fine.

11. In the end, remember that you are responsible.

As the party organizer, you are legally responsible for what goes on at your house. If there’s a lawsuit (i.e., a drunken frat boy cuts his hand when punching through your stained glass window and wants you to pay for the medical bill), you can be held liable. In addition, the presence of drug paraphernalia, poppers or even glow sticks can be used by the police as evidence that drugs were available at the party. A citation for contributing to the delinquency of minors is quite a blemish on the resume. So don’t drink too much that you can’t take charge of the situation if the need arises.

It’s your responsibility to exercise your rights when it comes to protecting your house from searches. The law is on your side, so use it. No evidence and no consent means no searches.

Now let the merrymaking commence.

Summary of Important Points

• Keep all illegal activities out of plain view
• Don’t let anyone but you open the door for the cops
• Immediately shut the door behind you to distance the police from the revelry inside
• Be calm and non-confrontational
• Respect the police’s authority and use the term “officer”
• Determine why the cops are there
• Tell them you do not consent to a search
• Do not let them in without a warrant
• Answer their questions with questions, like, “Am I free to go?”
• Either tell the truth or don’t answer when questioned
• Do not admit to anything illegal without your attorney there
• Always stay sober enough to deal with a run-in with the law

I do not claim to be an expert in party-related laws. If you have specific questions like, “what if X happens and the cops do Y?” do not ask me – I won’t be able to answer. This post is not legal counsel. It’s simply my personal take on dealing with cops based on my battle-tested party-throwing experience and tactics to prevent illegal searches of your sacred home.

Now read: How to Cop-Proof Your House >

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On My Wish List: 5 Multi-Color LED Lightbulbs w/ Remote

Although Christmas 2008 has come and gone, I’m already starting my wish list for next year. I recently re-stumbled upon these sick Multi-Color LED remote controlled lights and immediately had to have them. They screw into normal bulb sockets, offer 16 colors, and have a bunch of transitions and effects.

Strategically place a few of these puppies around the bar or dance floor, and you’ve got yourself club lighting on the cheap. They’re $49.99 a pop at ThinkGeek, an awesome and intelligent online store. If nothing else, check out their site to see what kinds of crazy/nerdy stuff they have.

The bulb’s notable features include:

• IR remote turns bulb on/off and adjust colors, transitions, and brightness
• 4 transition effects – flash, strobe, fade, smooth
• 16 colors (including White, Green, Blue, Light Blue, Red, Orange, Yellow, Turquoise, Purple)
• Fits into a standard lightbulb socket (E27)

Think about the possibilites: changing the color of a room according to your mood, shifting the atmosphere at the push of a button, toggling effects like strobe and fade. I’ve never seen one of these in action, but based on the pictures and description, they’re now on my Must Have list.

Leave a comment and spread the love. Have you ever seen these before? If so, what did you think? Also, do you know of any other cool lighting effects?

Party Trick: How to Make Orange Jello Shots

Jello shots seem like a great idea until guests realize they can’t get the Jello out without crushing their cups or dipping in their fingers in. Sticky icky.

If you have money, you can always buy Twist’n Shot Jello Shot Cups. These make it easy to separate Jello from the side of the cup. But why spend money on plastic when you can use oranges? (The orange slices above are holding Jello, not orange flesh).

Here’s what you need:

Ingredients: 2 oranges, 1 package of orange Jello, and 1/2 cup of vodka.

Directions: Slice oranges in half. Scoop out all the inside with a spoon (the flesh and divider pith). You’re left with 4 empty orange halves. Bring your orange-flavored Jello plus 1/2 cup of water to a boil. When the Jello is totally dissolved, add your 1/2 cup of vodka. Then pour the delicious concoction into your orange halves. Put them in the fridge for about 4 hours or until firm.

When serving, cut each half into 3 wedges. It yields 12 slices.

Quick Tip: For Large Parties, Use Plastic Shot Glasses

Here’s one pearl of wisdom that will serve you well:

Never use glass shot glasses if you’re having more than 30 people over.

In fact, get all your shot glasses out of sight and locked away so no drunken guest can find them. Once you’ve tucked those puppies away, run to the grocery store and drop two bucks on a set of 50 plastic shot glasses.

Believe me: you don’t want to hear the sound of crashing, breaking glass while you’re tipsy, hosting a large party and laying your best game on the cute girl in your calculus class.

Remember Murphy’s law? If anything can go wrong, it will. Never is this more true than when your house is filled with highly intoxicated coeds. I learned this the hard way.

If you use real glass shot glasses, my promise to you is this: they will dropped and broken, and it will happen at exactly the wrong moment during your party. Not only will you lose your shot glass forever, but you will have a herd of drunken guests stampeding over shards of broken glass. That’s not a recipe for success.

So remember: buy plastic shot glasses and hide your real ones when you’re having more than just your close friends over.

How to Effectively Set Up Your Sound System (the cheap, quick and easy way)

Your sound system can make or break your party. If the music is too soft, nobody will dance. If it’s only coming from one side of the room, half the room will be frustrated. If it’s only playing on one floor, the other floors will seem dead. You want your house to be like a club – no matter where a person goes, they always hear the music that’s being played on the dance floor. The easiest way to accomplish this is with audio splitters.

Stereo splitter:

A stereo splitter lets you route your iPod or laptop into two separate speaker systems at different sides of the room. I own the Monster Cable splitter shown above, which costs $9.95. I’ve seen stereo splitters sell for as low as $2.95. They are incredibly cheap and will literally double the power of your sound system if you have enough speakers (which you should, between you, your housemates, and all your friends). It is one of the best audio investments you can make, and it costs less than eating out.

You’ll also need extension cables to reach the speakers at either end of the dance floor.

Stereo extension cable:

Extension cables are inexpensive. The 6-foot stereo extender shown above costs $3.95. A larger, 25-foot stereo extender from YourCableStore.com costs – brace yourself – $4.25.

Dance floor layout:

Cover the maximum possible area on the dance floor with equal volume by putting your speakers in opposite corners of the room.

Make sure that your extension cables can’t get tripped over. The easiest way is to tape them against the line where the floor meets the wall. Or you can use wire staples along the walls and ceiling to run the wires overhead and out of sight.

If you have some extra cash lying around and are fairly electronics-savvy, consider wireless speakers. You won’t have to deal with hiding long cords if the music is beamed wirelessly. Keep in mind that truly wireless audio is a relatively new market, so make sure you do research before diving in headfirst.

Turn up the bass on your speakers. This is especially important for dance parties, because bass will keep the dance floor moving. However, make sure the bass levels are in line with the treble (higher pitched) levels. You want your low and high frequencies balanced and clear – not muddy and low.

How To Control Your Light Effects via Remote Control (for under 16 bucks)

To control hard to reach or ceiling-mounted strobe lights/lasers by remote control, buy a wireless power outlet switch. Plug the switch into the wall, plug your light into the switch, turn the light on, then use the remote control that comes with the switch to turn the light off and on (see image below for details). You can get a switch online for $29.99 at Amazon, or in electronics stores (I got the black one below for $15.00 at RadioShack).

With the remote control in your pocket, you can turn the strobe light on for Sandstorm with one click of a button, and turn it off when the song ends. All without interrupting your fist-pumping.

Since strobe lights aren’t very effective when competing with other lights such as blacklights, consider buying two power outlet switches: one for your strobe light, and one for your other lights. This way, you can turn your other lights off and your strobe light on at the same exact time – a very impressive party effect that will get everyone moving, all from the comfort of wherever you’re standing.

5 Tips For Strobe Lights: How to Make People Dance Their Pants Off

A strobe light can quickly turn a small dorm room into a wild dance party. Even if you’re sober as a bird, a strobe light at the right speed will feel like you’ve just taken a triple-shot of Bacardi 151. The slow-motion visuals make dancing 10 times more fun, and since it’s harder to see the person next to you, everybody will start wildly dancing. Believe me – I can’t count the times I’ve turned a low-key, dorm room hangout session into a raucous, shirtless dance party simply with a portable strobe light.

For small to medium rooms, all you need is a “mini strobe,” like this:

You can get this kind of mini strobe almost anywhere online, such as this one for $14.95 at PartyUnlimited.com. They’re also sold DJ supply stores and Spencer’s gifts. For larger rooms, get a stronger strobe. (The strobe pictured above is 20 watts). Although it’s possible to link multiple strobe heads together so they flash in sync, it can be a pain to set up. If you know how, more power to you. If not, keep things simple. Here are five more tips to keep your party bumping with a strobe light:

1. Don’t turn on two unlinked strobes in the same room. They will cancel out each other and kill the desired effect.
2. When you turn on your strobe light, turn off any competing lights (blacklights, hallway lights, bar lights, light coming in from the window, etc.). Strobe lights are best used in otherwise near-black rooms, so turn off as many competing lights as you can before turning it on.
3. Always buy a strobe that has a variable speed setting so you can change the number of flashes per second. Usually, you want to avoid the fastest and slowest speeds – the slowest is too mellow to be exciting, and the fastest is too quick to provide visual effects. Often, the best speed is about 2/3 of the way between the slowest and fastest settings. You’ll know you’ve hit a good speed when you move your hands in front of your face and think you’re moving in slow motion.
4. Don’t aim your strobe light directly into your guests’ eyes. First, position it as high as possible. Consider using the light’s built-in ceiling-mountable hole. Then point it down at a steep angle.
5. After awhile, strobe lights get painful on the eyes. Don’t leave yours on all night – you will drive out your guests. Instead, turn it on at peak moments in your favorite songs, or for entire classic songs like Sandstorm. Strobe lights work best with techno/trance/house music, so turn it on for Daft Punk but off for 50 Cent.

A strobe light is an extremely cheap and incredibly effective addition to your party. It is by far the best way to increase the energy and enhance the mood of a party. Get one. It will set your parties apart from the average college shindig and keep people talking.

Quick Tip: How to Set Up Your Trash Cans

1. Strategically place trashcans where people tend to congregate or expect garbage cans.

Put trashcans wherever they will be useful: in the kitchen, the bar, the bathroom, the dance floor, the beer pong table, etc. The more, the better. If a drunk guest finishes their beer and sees no trashcan nearby, they’re tossing it straight to the floor, spilling the last few sips they were too tipsy to notice. That means a sticky mess tomorrow. Make sure you have enough trashcans that people understand the floor is not a used can/cup repository.

2. Double-bag each trashcan.

Double-bag each trashcan with fifty-gallon garbage bags. Wet trash (including beer and puke) can be disposed of later without dripping stickiness all over the floor.

3. Optional: Put some newspaper under each trashcan for near misses and spills.

Inevitably, people will miss the trash can. Laying down some newspaper will help absorb spills and prevent extra clean-up work later. Doing this comes down to personal preference and isn’t exactly necessary, but might give you more peace of mind during the party.

4. Designate certain trashcans for beer cans only.

If you’re using cans, this is a must. It will simplify your recycling efforts later, making it easier to earn cash back on returns. 

5. Optional: Spice up your trashcans to encourage people to clean up after themselves.

Why not attach a basketball hoop make throwing away empties more enjoyable? Or simply create a backboard that makes it easier for people to toss cans in from a distance.

Final note:

Every 5 minutes you spend preparing trashcans will save you 20 minutes cleaning up spilled beer afterwards. It’s worth the time and effort to plan out how you’ll make sure trash ends up where it’s supposed to.

Quick Tip: Drop The Temperature Of Your House The Day Of

About four hours before your party starts, open some windows and turn off the furnace to drop the temperature of your house. It’s going to get packed and hot later, so cool down the house while you still can.

Remember, you’re probably going to have to close your windows to keep down noise once the party starts. That traps in heat, and when it gets crowded and people start dancing, the temperature will skyrocket quickly.

Beforehand, open all your windows and put in fans to blow in cool air. The more you can drop the temperature before people arrive, the less sweaty guests will be later, and the more they’ll want to come back next time.

How to Cop-Proof Your House Party

Now that you’ve dealt with the neighbors, it’s time to prepare your house. Police are automatically suspicious of loud houses, especially at night. And with good reason – houses that are obnoxiously loud almost always have some kind of illegal activity going on inside. So, you need to make your house to appear visually dead from the outside – even if you’re throwing a massive rave inside. Here’s how.

1. Make the house appear dead from the outside.

Line of sight: Windows. Cover all windows with thick drapes or black garbage bags. Never open the windows at any time during the party. Put locks on them if necessary. Police should notice nothing from outside, even if they come right to your door for a noise complaint. Remember, they will leave unless you give them a reason to stay (i.e., a bong sitting in plain view through the front window). So cover those windows! Keeping them closed will also help keep the music from leaking into the streets.

Line of sight: Doors. Make sure you can’t see anything incriminating through the front or back door. Install a curtain or just keep the activities out of the entranceway. Otherwise, through no fault of your own, a police officer might catch a glimpse of something illegal as a guest enters or exits your house. That gives them a reason to legally enter. (Your front door should always be locked, as described in point #3).

2. Direct and damper the volume as much as possible.

Direct the volume. Point your speakers away from areas that might cause trouble, like your neighbor’s house or the middle of the street. The direction of your speakers largely affects how sound spreads outside.

Damper the volume. Do everything in your power to make sure music doesn’t leak outside your house. Shutting and bagging your windows is the first step.

If you have any old mattresses, cover the windows that leak the most sound. Anything else that absorbs sound will help: rugs, mats, curtains, and plants near windows. Of course, rugs and mats will probably get soaked with beer by the end of the night, but you get the idea: anything that has mass will absorb sound waves. You can also buy vinyl barrier foam composite which helps to block sound.

Caulk and seal around your windows, then weather strip them. You can also add window film to the existing glass, or buy and apply an interior window insulation kit.

For the truly paranoid (or the truly rich), replace your windows with thicker, or even soundproof glass.

3. Create a single point of entry to your house.

This pearl of wisdom will make your life easier when it’s party time: Lock all doors but your back door to create a single entrance and exit.

The only unlocked door should be your back door. If crowds do form, you want them in your backyard, not in the middle of the street. Keeping your front door locked will also prevent the cops from sneaking a peek through your front door, or intimidating nearby guests into letting them in.

Funneling everyone into one entrance also simplifies money collection. When there’s only one entrance, you only need one person to collect money.

If possible, lock your front door in a way that guests can’t open it (i.e. lock them from the inside and the outside). That way, Bob can’t call Jim and tell Jim to sneak him in through the front door. That opens a whole can of worms that you don’t want to deal with, destroying your single point of entry, allowing people in without paying, leaking sound, creating crowds in the front yard, and potentially letting the police walk right in.

4. Control parking and car build-up.

Before guests arrive, tell them to carpool to decrease the number of vehicles nearby. Require designated drivers.

Tell friends to park down the street. Nothing says “college party” like 20 cars in front of your house. Ideally, everyone should walk to your party. This will decrease the number of cars and prevent drunk driving later.

Do take drivers’ keys if they’re drinking, and arrange a place for them to sleep over. You want your friends to be alive for your next bash.

5. Optional: Set up early warning systems to know if cops are coming.

Buy a police radio. Besides being entertaining, consumer police radios let you keep close tabs on the 5-0. More expensive models can tell you how far away transmissions are coming from. By the time cops arrive, you’ll have intercepted their call and turned your house into the quietest residence on the block.

If you successfully quiet things down before the cops arrive, they may think the noise complaint was fake. That’s good news, because they may not bother checking again if they receive another complaint. If you do notice a cruiser suspiciously driving by, don’t be a fool. Take the hint, lower the volume, and get your crowds under control. Then let the party continue.

Set up a security camera. It’s easy to set up a web cam looking out your window. If you can’t, have a techie friend do it for you. It will let you see what’s going on outside during your party from the safety of your home. You can see if crowds are spilling into the streets or if the police are driving by.

What if the cops do show up? Look forward to a detailed upcoming post called, “11 Things You Need To Know When the Cops Bust Your House Party.”

6. Optional: Register your party with the police.

Jenny Winkler, an Illinois college student, threw a joint Halloween party with her neighbors and had 10 kegs (way to go Jenny!). She registered with the police beforehand and didn’t have any issues. The police sergeant in the area said that most students don’t know it’s better to register a party with the police to avoid tickets. In Champaign, where Winkler’s party happened, you can get fined up to $290 per resident for kegs without a license.

The sergeant continued, saying that registering a party doesn’t give cops a free invitation. Rather, it gives them a chance to work with the hosts and have a contact in case someone calls them. Registering your party might be a good idea if it’s going to be massive.

But keep this in mind: even if you do register your party, if cops come and are greeted by a belligerent drunk, they’ll use that as a reason to shut your party down. But you might have a better chance of slipping by unscathed if you did register, because they can contact you and hopefully deal with the issue without shutting the party down. It’s your call.

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